Observations From Hadleyville: APOLOGIES TO LETTERMAN

Saturday, July 28, 2007

APOLOGIES TO LETTERMAN

TOP TEN REASONS

IT’S GREAT TO BE PASTOR DON

10. Free coffee with fill-up at participating Valley Texaco’s

9. Power to dispatch U.S. troops anywhere in the hemisphere without consulting congress

8. Less time waiting around in supermarkets because of recent addition of Pastor-Don-Only check-out aisle

7. Lifetime passes to all Jethawks home games

6. Counterboy at In-N-Out usually tosses in a couple extra ketchups without Pastor having to ask

5. With Donald Trump now underwriting Church, no further need for extra paper route

4. Steven Segal has agreed to play Pastor in the movie

3. Guest host shot on Vh-1’s Back to the Seventies

2. Annoying alarm system now hooked up to clapper

1. Mike lets him make siren noises on riding mower

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Don the Baptist considers himself to be both intellectually deep and extremely humorous. Don the Baptist assumes no responsibility for blog browsers who cannot tell the difference between the two. Blog browsers are advised to consider any "Observations from Hadleyville" content that makes no sense to be the result of a lack of intellect or sense of humor on the part of the blog browser and not that of the blogger. Don the Baptist is a non profit guy so don't bother suing Don the Baptist as it would be a waste of time and resources.

WORDS OF WISDOM FOR WRITERS

The secret of becoming a writer is that you have to write. You have to write a lot. You also have to finish what you write, even though no one wants it yet. If you don't learn to finish your work, no one will ever want to see it. The biggest mistake new writers make is carrying around copies of unfinished work to inflict on their friends.

I am sure it has been done with less, but you should be prepared to write and throw away a million words of finished material. By finished, I mean completed, done, ready to submit, and written as well as you know how at the time you wrote it.
-Jerry Pournelle

WHAT'S THIS HADLEYVILLE THING?

Those of you familiar with Mark Twain’s works might recognize my blog title. As Samuel Clemons grew older, he became increasingly disillusioned with humanity. Towards the end he began referring to the Damned Human Race; employing the secular and religious epithet at one stroke.

I find I’ve not reached that level of despair myself. I still believe in redemption and I still see signs of nobility even among we fallen, damned creatures. So, I could not bring myself to call this blog “On the Damned Human Race.” I do however, resonate with another of Clemmons stories; “The Man That Corrupted Hadleyburg.” And viola, there you have it. “Observations From Hadleyville.”