Observations From Hadleyville: WEEKENDS ARE FOR FUN

Saturday, November 19, 2011

WEEKENDS ARE FOR FUN

THE CALIFORNIA BIBLE

Here At Last, Dude!

Aren't you tired of the old translations of the Bible that make reading God's Holy Word so tedious? Are you frustrated with racking your brain over the archaic wording of the Living Bible?

Well suffer no more! Relief is here Dude!

Developed by actual graduate language students, between wave sets, the CALIFORNIA BIBLE has removed the awkward syntax and medieval language of older, more structured paraphrases.

Check it out!

8 So the sailors asked Jonah, "Yo, Dude! whats bring'in this bad karma down on us, y'know?
9 He answered, "Take a chill pill Bill! I'm like a Hebrew an' these gnarley waves were made by the Big Dude upstairs, y'know?
10 this terrified them and they asked, "Woah! are you mental dude? (They knew he was splittin' from the Big Dude upstairs because he had already clued them).
11 The sea was getting gnarlier and gnarlier. So they asked him, "Dude, like what should we do now?"
12 "Surfs up! These waves are mine!" He replied... Then they picked him up and threw him overboard.    Jonah 1:8-15

"Like, totally gnarly! y'know?"
Johnny McArthur III

3 comments:

teresabeesa said...: Love your QUASI-LEGAL DISCLAIMER! I can attest to your hilarity, my friend! RE: The California Bible...now you know why I listen to who I do on Sunday morning! =)); November 19, 2011 at 11:13 AM
Don the Baptist said...: Thanks, Teri.; November 19, 2011 at 12:01 PM
Eric said...: Gnarly post, Dude.; November 21, 2011 at 7:48 PM

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QUASI-LEGAL DISCLAIMER

Don the Baptist considers himself to be both intellectually deep and extremely humorous. Don the Baptist assumes no responsibility for blog browsers who cannot tell the difference between the two. Blog browsers are advised to consider any "Observations from Hadleyville" content that makes no sense to be the result of a lack of intellect or sense of humor on the part of the blog browser and not that of the blogger. Don the Baptist is a non profit guy so don't bother suing Don the Baptist as it would be a waste of time and resources.

WORDS OF WISDOM FOR WRITERS

The secret of becoming a writer is that you have to write. You have to write a lot. You also have to finish what you write, even though no one wants it yet. If you don't learn to finish your work, no one will ever want to see it. The biggest mistake new writers make is carrying around copies of unfinished work to inflict on their friends.

I am sure it has been done with less, but you should be prepared to write and throw away a million words of finished material. By finished, I mean completed, done, ready to submit, and written as well as you know how at the time you wrote it.
-Jerry Pournelle

WHAT'S THIS HADLEYVILLE THING?

Those of you familiar with Mark Twain’s works might recognize my blog title. As Samuel Clemons grew older, he became increasingly disillusioned with humanity. Towards the end he began referring to the Damned Human Race; employing the secular and religious epithet at one stroke.

I find I’ve not reached that level of despair myself. I still believe in redemption and I still see signs of nobility even among we fallen, damned creatures. So, I could not bring myself to call this blog “On the Damned Human Race.” I do however, resonate with another of Clemmons stories; “The Man That Corrupted Hadleyburg.” And viola, there you have it. “Observations From Hadleyville.”