Wednesday, November 28, 2007

HOLIDAY SHOPPING TIPS ADDENDUM

I once heard a comedian explain the differences between male and female shopping styles thusly;

In primitive times, the roles were divided, men were hunters, women were gatherers. This explains our pre-wired shopping styles.

Women had to browse from bush to bush searching for the best looking, smelling and tasting berries. This took a long time, and consequently women are committed to shopping over the long haul, making sure they haven't missed anything really tasty.

Hunting, on the other hand, requires a single-mindedness of purpose. Men on the hunt had to keep their single objective clearly in mind lest they be stomped or eaten by their objective. It went something like this: Mammoth. Must find Mammoth. Here is Mammoth. Kill Mammoth. Mammoth dead now. Haul Mammoth to village.

And that's the way it works today. Women browse from store to store, aisle to aisle, rack to rack, driving men insane because they have ONE SINGLE OBJECTIVE in mind.

Shirt. Must find shirt. Here is shirt. Kill shirt. Shirt dead now. Haul shirt to house.

4 comments:

Kathleen Flynn said...

I must be sexually confused: I hate shopping.

Don the Baptist said...

Darn, another social theory down the drain.

Kathleen Flynn said...

Nah, I'm just very different. Let's just leave it at that :)

Eric said...

Show me the store that lets me hunt mammoths and I'll become a shopping addict.